Cocktail Time – Patience Edition

Impatience is a big part of my marriage. That might sound like a bad thing, but it actually works out nicely. My husband and I both feel that, once a decision is made, it must happen as soon as possible. Then we slam our gears into overdrive to make whatever it is come to pass, all the while doing the impatient dance because it’s taking so damn long. We’re a good team.

My dad likes to say I can’t even wait for water to boil. That was absolutely true up until about five years ago, now I wait, but it annoys the ever loving hell out of me. And while I don’t mind the preparation part of cooking, the actual time it takes for food to cook bugs me. Slow cooker? No thank you. Once I’m done with the slicing and dicing and stirring, I want to eat, not wait 45 minutes while it all bakes. And yes, I am aware of how ridiculous that sounds.

My husband is just as bad. He can’t handle waiting. When we go to the grocery store, he will hop from one check out line to another if he thinks it will be quicker, and inevitably he will either move to a third line, or go back to the one he was in before. It never works out, and we wait the same amount of time or longer because of his line jumping. I personally resigned myself long ago to the fact that no matter which line I get in, it will be the wrong one. Him? Not so much.

But, like I said, it works out well, because we’re both that way. Therefore I consider it a testament to our love that my husband willingly participated in the Halloween/Dia de los Muertos cocktail, because he had to sit in a chair for an hour, without moving, while I painted his face. If you knew him, you would understand that is a miracle.

Happy Halloween boys and girls. Don’t drink and drive. Here’s a little something to get you through the evening.

Happy Halloween!

The Patient Man

  • 1 oz Tres Generations Reposado Tequila
  • 1 oz Meyers Dark Rum
  • 1 oz Tres Generations Almendrado Tequila (if you can’t find it, then substitute amaretto)
  • 1 oz crème de cacao (or any chocolate liqueur of your choosing)
  • 3 oz coffee
  • Cream to taste

In an ice-filled shaker, combine almendrado and reposado tequila, dark rum, crème de cacao, and coffee. Shake quickly, then pour into tall glass and add cream to taste. Enjoy!

More than you’ll ever want to know.

I’d like to think I’m an intelligent woman. I am both a curious person and voracious reader and therefore know a lot about a variety of things. The problem is that much of what I know is absolutely useless, so much so that I am sometimes embarrassed to know anything on the topic at all.

In part, I blame the internets for making it all too easy to search out the inane. I also blame the full moon. I have problems sleeping almost always, but a few days before a full moon and the couple days following it are the worst. I have weird dreams, wake up, and can’t go back to sleep. The other night, while trying to fall back asleep after a strange dream, a plot hole in my new project suddenly came crashing down on me. I jumped out of bed and ran to my computer in order to take notes immediately, lest I forget what I was thinking.

And that brings me to why I now know more about urine than anyone outside of the medical profession should.

While researching information pertaining to my plot hole, I came across a list on Random Facts of 99 things you don’t know about urine. This, by the way, had nothing to do with what I was looking for, and I’m not entirely sure why Google thought it was appropriate, but whatever. It didn’t stop me from skimming the entire list, and thoroughly reading about 60% of it, some of the items twice. An inordinate amount of time was spent thanking my lucky stars I wasn’t an Eskimo, wasn’t alive in pretty much any ancient civilization, and finally, hoping that I’m not reincarnated as a hunting dog.

I never did find the information I was searching for (or get back to sleep), though I now posses a number of useless facts about left-handedness, dreams, and Halloween. And, most unfortunately, I discovered you can commission a fact list if you can’t find what you want on their website. Obviously, a great deal of time was wasted pondering what I want to commission.

Damn you, internet.

Things to consider

For whatever reason, the history of women and psychiatry has popped up several times in the past few weeks for me. I’ve seen two separate art exhibits revolving around the theme, and then there is the new season of American Horror Story. I’ve read some commentary from folks who feel like the show shoves a feminist agenda down the throats of its viewers. Personally, I think it’s those very issues that make the show interesting. Were it not for the underlying message, the show would be flat out weird and disturbing.

Anyway, the first two episodes of AHS: Asylum reminded me of a story my mother told me when I was a teenager. When she was a teenager herself, a family member was in a bad marriage. The husband stayed out all hours, catted about and spent money while leaving the wife home with the kids, it was basically a typical if terrible dysfunctional relationship. Keep in mind that this would have been in the late 50s/early 60s, and divorce was not common. When he would finally come home, the wife would of course be enraged. His response was to threaten her by saying that, in a nutshell, she had better suck it up and deal with it, or he would have her committed.

I remember being utterly confused by this, and my mom’s explanation was something along the lines of, “Oh yeah, they could still do that back then. A husband could commit his wife for all kinds of reasons.”

Teenage me was in disbelief. I think it was the first time I ever thought about women’s rights. A little research told me that, yes, women could be institutionalized by their husbands, for being promiscuous, or because they were gay. And I learned other things too, like the fact that it wasn’t until the 1970s that legislation was passed that made it easier for women to obtain credit in their own name. It’s difficult to imagine that just a few years before I was born credit wasn’t readily available to women.

I think it’s easy to forget that the current state of modern Western woman is a relatively new thing. Let’s face it, in the grand scheme of human history, the widespread idea that women should be treated with fairness and equality is still pretty darned new. And yet we already fail to remember that women (and men, many of them fought hard for women’s rights) had to fight for things like the right to vote, or not to be discriminated against in the workplace (which sadly still happens all too often). This is a big part of why I find it frustrating when women don’t care about voting. For crying out loud, in America we haven’t even had the right to do so for a hundred years yet, so how can anyone be lackadaisical about it?

I think it’s worth noting that pretty much all of the above doesn’t only apply to women, but to minorities too. Going back to American Horror Story, if you’ve been watching this season then you know that it isn’t just women’s issues at the forefront of the show, race and disabilities are addressed as well. And individuals with disabilities are certainly yet another population of people for which the current standard is very new.

My grandmother is in her 80s, and still takes care of her eldest child, my aunt, who has Down’s syndrome. My aunt was born in 1950, at a time when it was quite common for people with Down’s, or any disability really, to be institutionalized. Despite pressure to place her child in a group home, my grandmother refused. And from what I understand, that pressure came from all sorts of people, including hospital staff. I can’t imagine having someone tell you to give up your brand new baby. Apparently, neither could she. My grandma went on to have five other children, each just a few years apart from the next. Six kids, one with special needs, and not a lot of money, makes for a tough job as a mom. That’s admirable, in my book.

I wasn’t sure where I was going with this post when I began, but I guess I’m saying that taking things for granted is a very good way to lose something.

That’s all. Now go forth and enjoy the weekend.