Dude, I am so happy to get back to a normal routine. Yes, I am well aware I wrote a post last month about shaking things up and getting out of my comfort zone. But you know something? The snow globe of my life has been shaken quite enough, thank you very much. It’s time for everything to settle so I can get some work done. And by work, I mean writing.
I will say one thing about the rollercoaster of the past few weeks – all my focus was centered on fixing stuff and the holidays, with no time left to think about much else. While it was a lot of work, it was also, in a strange way, a big vacation for other parts of my mind. Or, maybe that’s a totally incorrect interpretation, maybe the creative side of my brain secretly worked in overtime trying to remove the blockage that built up the last few months of the year. Whatever the case, I’m rarin’ to go. At least I think I am, today is really the first opportunity I’ve had to sit down and write. But I definitely have ideas buzzing, oodles of them, just waiting to spill onto the page. And I will get to all of those thoughts in the coming weeks, just not today.
Today let’s ponder what in the Sam hell goes through people’s minds.
So yesterday we went to the movies, something I usually view as an unpleasant task. Don’t get me wrong, I love movies, I just hate going to the movie theater. Give me the comfort of my own home, where I don’t have to worry about inhaling other people’s germs every time someone coughs or sneezes, where I don’t have to have some dude sit next to me with a gargantuan tub of gross, cholesterol-laden, shiny buttered popcorn, which he obnoxiously gobbles for the first hour of the film, interspersed with the nails-on-a-chalkboard sound of a straw squeaking against a plastic lid of a jumbo soda, and where I don’t have to hear an asinine conversation between a couple in which the woman asks the man every minute or two what’s happening in the movie (although admittedly I do that to my husband too, but I do it AT HOME).
Wow, that was an incredibly long sentence that makes me sound like a big ole misanthrope.
Anyway, luck was on our side, and we arrived to only a short line. Within half a minute, 20 people or so lined up behind us, with more showing up in droves, a large percentage of which had no idea what they were there to see. Personally, I already know what I’m going to watch before arriving at the theater. But hey, not everyone works that way, no biggie. What I could not understand was the group of women right behind us that had no idea what movie they wanted to watch, or an idea as to what ANY of the movies were about.
Woman 1: What’s On the Road?
(Chorus of I don’t knows)
Woman 2: What’s Life of Pi?
They walked up to the ticket counter next to us, still without a clue about what they wanted to see, and asked the glassy-eyed attendant, “What’s Hyde Park about?”
He responded by handing them a sheet of paper with plot descriptions. They were still reading them when we walked away, and I’m sure the people waiting in line were just thrilled.
The thing that baffled me about the whole scene was that two of them were holding iphones. Come on, now. You have an iphone, you have a data package. That means you could have looked up a plot description, or the freaking movie trailer, at any point before walking up to the ticket counter. And if you are wondering if perhaps the women in question were extremely elderly and therefore not adept at using the tiny computer at their fingertips, you would be wrong.
At that point, my husband and I parted ways, he watched Rust and Bone, and I saw Anna Karenina. Halfway through the movie, I hear this noise behind me – sctchscrthscrthscrthscrth. On and on this went, until I finally turned my head to see what caused the ruckus. It was a woman filing her nails. At the movie theater. Unfortunately they were long, so the filing continued for a long time. Not only was it annoying, but I had a hard time concentrating after that because I couldn’t stop thinking about how much of her dead cell dust I was inhaling. Gross. I suspect it will be a while before I make it to another new release.
Humans, we’re an interesting bunch. Happy Monday y’all!