Holy hell. It’s Monday. It’s Halloween. It’s the release of my book, Human Resources, Martinis, and Other Bad Things. And I have so many other things to write about this week, but haven’t yet because I had an identity theft scare today – still not certain what’s happening on that front, but rest assured I’ll be angry rant blogging about it if some mofo ripped me off.
But on to happier things.
Today, my friends, is the day you can purchase Human Resources, Martinis, and Other Bad Things on Amazon. You can do so here.
Also, several people asked if you have to own a Kindle to order the book. The answer is no. Kindle has free apps you can download that allow you to read books on your PC, iPhone, Blackberry, and pretty much every sort of device with a screen. Here is the Amazon page that gives instructions.
So, while thinking about what to say regarding my book, something occurred to me. Of course I want you to buy the book. Of course I want you to read it. And if you do, I’d love it if you left a review on my Amazon page, and I’d love it even more if you told everyone you know about the book. All of this goes without saying (even though I said it).
In the interest of fairness, and to further help you decide if you’d like to fork over the 99 cents needed to buy your very own copy of Human Resources, Martinis, and Other Bad Things, I’m going to give some information about who may not want to purchase. A disclaimer, if you will.
• If you are perfect, then you might not want to purchase my book, because you probably won’t like it.
• If you don’t actually read, you might not want to buy it because there aren’t any pictures. Well, except the cover, so technically you could go ahead and pay for it. Wait, scratch that, you can see the cover on Amazon, and on my blog. So no, don’t buy it if you don’t read.
*If you are the Grammar Police, then I’m not suggesting you not buy the book, but I am going to give you a forewarning.
1. This book is written entirely from the perspective of the main character. Most people neither speak nor think in grammatically perfect sentences, therefore it isn’t written that way, so keep this in mind and don’t let it niggle your brain too much.
2. However, if you find something you consider to be a legitimate mistake, then guess what? You can email it to me, and I will change that shizz, just for you (as long as it isn’t an intentional part of the book). Amazon is awesome that way, you can update content. If you are the Grammar Police then you should freaking love this, because you can correct me to your little heart’s content. Awesome, right? Make sure to put GRAMMAR POLICE in the subject heading of the email, and contact me at email@example.com.
And for the record, I am not kidding. Here’s a story for you – While I was a grad student I worked as a TA. The professor wanted to see the Power Point for my first lecture to make sure nothing was missing, etc. I went through the whole thing, and at the end she said, “Everything was great, except slide 12 needs to be changed. You wrote asses. It should be assess. I’m sure the students will think it’s funny, but let’s go ahead and change that, okay?”
So, the point is, feel free to point out my asses.
What else? Oh, if you are a guy, don’t be afraid to buy the book. It’s not about shopping and tampons. Well, both of those do appear, but only temporarily, and they serve a purpose. My husband thought the book was funny. And yes, I hear you saying, ‘well of course he did, he’s your dude.’ But I swear, he’s pretty honest in his criticisms. So how ‘bout this – if you’re a guy and you read it, email me and give me a Man Review about the book. Oh, and leave one on Amazon too.
If you have a Nook, I will post an update once I have information on Nook availability.
Finally, I do believe I am going to take the advice of a commenter, and ask that if you plan to purchase the book, then it would be awesome if you do so today and tomorrow. This will push the book up through the day’s rankings, which will help make it noticeable to other readers. But, if you choose to buy it this weekend instead, I will be just as happy.
On a separate and unrelated note, Happy Halloween. Sometimes it’s hard to tell in Los Angeles who is in costume and who’s in their every day get up.